Make His Face to Shine On Me

Last week during a weekday mass, one of our priests shared a homily that really put into perspective the way that God cares for us. The priest happens to be from India. He shared that in Hinduism, the main religion in India, people believe they must seek out a god to have any sort of connection.  He explained just how different that is for Christians and our relationship with the one True God. God is always seeking us. This can be seen in countless places in the Bible but one of my favorites is in the book of Ezekiel.  For thus says the Lord God: Behold, I, I myself will search for my sheep, and will seek them out. As a shepherd seeks out his flock when some of his sheep have been scattered abroad, so will I seek out my sheep; and I will rescue them from all places where they have been scattered on a day of clouds and thick darkness. (Ezekiel 34:11-12) When I reflect on my attitude towards God in the past, I think about how sometimes, when things in life were difficult, I thou...

Sometimes I wonder, am I really prepared for a true miracle? Would I trust something miraculous if it happened to me? Every time I read the Gospels, I wonder w hat I would truly do if I was offered, face-to-face, with Jesus presenting miracles. One of my favorite miracles is from the Gospel of Mark.  Many gathered together so that there was no longer room for them, not even around the door, and [Jesus] preached the word to them.  They came bringing to him a paralytic carried by four men.  Unable to get near Jesus because of the crowd, they opened up the roof above him. After they had broken through, they let down the mat on which the paralytic was lying.  When Jesus saw their faith, he said to the paralytic, “Child, your sins are forgiven.”  Now some of the scribes were sitting there asking themselves,  “Why does this man speak that way? *  He is blaspheming. Who but God alone can forgive sins?”  Jesus immediately knew in his mind what they were ...

Something that has been bothering me when my body seems to fail me is the thought that one day, my soul will be reunited with my body and have a chance to be with God for eternity. As someone who has lived with cancer, Muscular Dystrophy, amputation, and debilitating chronic pain, I just feel like I want to escape this body.  Sometimes I have such a strong desire to jump in and do things and have fun with my family and friends or spend time in silent Adoration of the Blessed Sacrament, but a lot of times, my physical pain distracts me from being present and causes me to be more focused on my body. At those times my body feels like more of a burden than a gift.   So when considering eternal life, the idea that this is the body I'm stuck with was discouraging for a while. I wanted nothing more than to leave this shell and escape into freedom from the cross I carried.  But then one day at Mass we read the story of Thomas doubting that Jesus had returned (John 20: 24-29). Wh...

So I’ve decided to start blogging again. For those of you that don’t know, I am in a period of true miraculous spiritual transition .  I want to share my journey in my quest for unwavering faith, in my experience with living with a physical disability, and my passion for experiencing the best that life has to offer in every situation, by the grace of God.   In May, my fiancé and I will be baptized and fully confirmed into the Catholic Church. While I understand now that this is my home, I must admit that at first I found things a little intimidating- after all, this is the original church full of years and years of traditions. I had a lot to learn. When I think about the first time I attended Mass, I remember how nervous I felt not knowing how to fully participate. My first Mass was actually on an Ash Wednesday. I remember receiving my ashes and hearing the person administering them say, “from dust you were made and to dust you will return”.   That sentence stuck with me ...